Ups and Downs

The past month or so has been a real rollercoaster for me emotionally. I have been feeling very depressed, with low energy levels and lots of tears. I was beginning to think I was losing it mentally. To help myself snap out of this, I went for acupuncture last week. After talking to my acupuncturist, she told me it was probably a side-effect of the Tamoxifen that I take. If you remember from earlier posts, Tamoxifen is an estrogen inhibitor which pushes your body into menopause (for those of us who haven't gotten there yet). Well, just knowing that made me feel better. I also started taking Vitamin D, which is known to help with depression. I have felt so much better over the past week. My energy is back. There's been a lot less crying, and I feel much more hope for the future.

The Project

Home improvement has been part of our lives since we bought our first home. I have at times been less than enthusiastic about some of the projects John wanted to tackle, but in the end, we have been very pleased with the results. The most recent project is no exception. It is an extension to our patio plus a fence to give us more privacy. One of the neatest parts of this project was that John was able to recycle the old redwood benches that were there and use the 2x4s as joists for the decking, as well as framing for the fencing. Phase 1 is now complete on the east side. Phase 2 will commence next spring when the snow melts. So far, it's looking great!

A Little Taste of Winter

A winter storm rolled through the valley yesterday, dumping several inches of heavy, wet snow. We went from 65 degrees and warm sunshine the day before to 32 and snow within 24 hours. It's hard to get acclimated when it happens that fast! When the clouds finally cleared away this afternoon, I snapped this photo before the sun went down. The snow on the Bridgers was so bright, it hurt my eyes to look at them. Weather is so amazing.

Hungry Bear

During the fall in Montana, it's a good idea to bring in bird feeders and garbage cans at night so roving bears aren't tempted. Well, we didn't do a very good job of either, and last night had a hungry visitor. He knocked over the garbage can, dragging stuff clear out onto the golf course. Then he knocked over the yard waste can. Finally, he tried to get at my suet feeder, which amazingly held together. It just got a little stretched. What's amazing is that he didn't bother my can of birdseed which sits up on the patio. That would have been his pot 'o gold!

Fall Cleaning

This week I decided to clean out my closet a bit, and donate my wig and several fleece hats to the Cancer Support Community in Bozeman. They offer a program to give wigs and hats to women who have lost their hair due to chemotherapy. One of the women in my support group used this service, and was really glad to have a private place to try on a wig. They even offer styling services after you've chosen a wig. When I lost my hair, I was unaware of this service, so I ended up trying on wigs at a salon. It was uncomfortable, but mostly because I had to look at myself in the mirror. The wig I got was fine, but I only ended up wearing it a handful of times. It just wasn't me. I hope that it will help another woman during a very difficult time.

Cattle Drive

Yesterday I helped move and sort a small herd of cows & calves that belong to my friends Connie & Al. Al is taking most of the calves to the stockyard to sell today. Everything went smoothly and the horses were well-behaved, despite the cold wind and snow squalls. Over the years, it's been fun to help out with Al's herd, and good to see how well-cared for the animals are. I definitely see the benefits in the quality of beef that ends up in our freezer. Nice to know where your food comes from.

Mending In The Mountains

I just returned from a 3-day retreat for women who have or have had cancer. It was held at the 320 Guest Ranch up Gallatin Canyon. 70 women from Montana, Massachussetts, Michigan & North Carolina attended (I may have missed a few states). The weekend was made up of different activities to help us cope with our illness. The focus was on learning how to write about our experiences. It was really the first time I had ever written down my thoughts and feelings, and it was very emotional, especially reading them out loud to the group. Some of the stories were so heart-wrenching. We also had support groups, plus time to relax with yoga, walks, etc. While it was a very difficult time for me, I feel better for having gone. I met so many wonderful, strong women. I hope to go again next year.